Apologies to AA Milne.....

Halfway down the stairs is a stair where I sit.

There isn't any other stair quite like it.

I'm not at the bottom, I'm not at the top;

So this is the stair where I always stop.

Barking on the stairs is a game I play,

I really would not want it any other way.

I'm heard at the bottom, I'm heard at the top

and I can hear the Guv shouting

ROSIE  JUST  STOP!